April 26th, year 2009.

This is the history of a teen human. Me, in other words. I first have to introduce myself to you.
I live in France, and go to the same school as Alba and Jenn. We know each other pretty well. They're what I would call 'friends'. Both of them. Then again, I have friends of my age, such as people in my class, but who doesn't?
My name, I shall not list here, as it is not important in my life. A name is just something that another being calls you. It's a way to identify yourself from the others. My name is not like that. We could call me 'That dude over there, in that dark corner, plotting something obviously bad, wearing the black shirt and jeans, with the weird-looking hair' and I wouldn't mind. People call me by a diminuished name, Bart. I kinda like that name, except when it referrs to the Simpsons. Know that I'm not yellow, nor 'fat'.
My age also has no matter anyhow. I could be old or young, people wouldn't care (much). But I guess my actions depend on my age, but saying that I am only a teenager, I guess you can guess approximately my age.
Hey, whoa there- Wait a minute. 'Teenage' does not mean 'Not Mature' to me. In fact, I find myself very 'mature' as we say, compared to the others of my class. My mind seems to think and get things a certain way. Instead of using the simplest thing that comes to mind, I force myself to make it as complicated as possible, even worse.
Most 'teenagers' would rediculise you if you were in love with someone else. They would rediculise you for two obvious reasons:
-You're in love. (OMFG, he's/she's in love, *blabs to everyone else*)
Then, depending on the person you love,
-You're in love. (OMFG, you love her/him?! He's so stupid/ugly/stubborn/etc/whatever!)
That's basically what a teenager would do. You'll say that I see things in a stereotypical way. Wait until you see the school I go to, then you'll accept how I think of them.
This is why, basically, my age does not matter, as I'm not like the majority of my age.
Now, lessee. My religion. I don't have any. I'm profoundly atheist, and I'm proud of it. It's not like I don't like Christianity, Muslims, etc. It's just that, whenever I hear, 'religion', my mind translates it to this:
Religion means having a God. God chooses fate and destiny of one person.
And, I don't beleive in fate or destiny, because I do not like the idea that I am not in control of MY life. I don't want somebody to blame my bad acts on. Whenever I do something bad, I can only blame myself. THAT's my sort of religion.
Now, who I am, mentally. I'm pretty relaxed out, and I try not to think about pessimistic things (as you can see, I cannot do it. look at my style of writing.). My mind mostly focuses itself on the past, but then I say to myself that what is done is done, and that I have changed now. I am very neutral, and pretty pacifist. I can manage to let my rage boil inside my blood for a pretty long time, but as I come back home, I just cannot help it, but to shove my fist into the bark of a tree. This doesn't affect me much, as I'm a mazochist, and I reject any reflex to pain. I come back home, my right hand aching (I'm right handed, just so you know), but I do not show pain. I try not to hit other consciousness, as I would regret it later, even if I said that what is done is done, and there's nothing I can do about it.
Now, what I do daily. My life is mostly concentrated on the computer, navigating forums and such. But my outer life is much, much worse/better than that. I live in a city, but each weekend, I go to a mountain house, where I wake up at 4:00 AM, then walk alone in the village, without anything bothering me (Just so you know, I'm a very quick sleeper: I can sleep from midnight to 4:00 AM without being very tired). I like to think about people. Lots of people. My friends, my cared ones. My love. My enemies. Who makes me, me.
I can also be found drawing (Virtually or in real life. yeah, I have a talent in most things that gather art, such as poetry, drawing, etc.), or writing a story (almost never on paper itself, because then I have to rewrite it on the comp...).

There. That's basically me. Now that I have introduced myself to you guys, I hope you'll look at this diary sometimes. it would be a great pleasure to give your opinion to things that I do, even though it probably won't make me change...

April 27th, year 2009.

Had that dream again. The same dream for months now. It shouldn't be called a dream, more like a nightmare, but not scary enough to be qualified like that.
I'm stuck in a room. Light comes from nowhere, as there is light but no light source. I turn around, and noticed a chair. I walk towards it. I sit on it.
Of course, it seems all like 'that's nothing' to you. Here's the part:
I stay sitting on the chair for exactly 10 seconds. At the end of the 10 seconds, I hear a click on the back of my head. I turn around, and see a cloaked man pointing a gun at my chest. He shoots. Normally, by the force of the bullet, I shood by shot down, but I stay sitting upwards. I approach my hand to the bullet hole, and put it up to my face. My hand is covered in blood. I fall backwards.
And that's when I wake up, finally. This 'dream' does not bother me now. I've had it for a long time. But I'm sure it means something.
I woke up late. Dunno why. I normally wake up at 4:00 AM. Here, on my alarm radio, it says, 6:30 AM. I quickly get up and take my small breakfast, made by two slices of bread, and a bowl of chocolate milk. My brother enters the kitchen, kinda surprised that I'm eating so quickly. I explain him briefly, but he does not understand. I don't blame him. He always puts things to the last minute.
I walk (run) out of the kitchen, go into my room, dress myself, stare at my computer for 10 seconds, then look at the mirror. I clean my face, then stare at the pink thing I need to shove into my mouth when I sleep. I quietly think, 'F*** that thing', and go to school, bag prepared.
As I go to school, the deafening noise and weird odours enter my body. I try to block them out, but nothing did: they kept pestering me. I fastened my pace, unable to take it anymore, and headed to school by a shortcut.
As I arrived to school, I dropped my bag near the 'C' building (yes, the buildings are named with letters) and waited for more people to come. First, Brooke and Lindsay were seen. Then, more people, I can't remember who, then, Jenn, Alba, and more people. I talked to Jenn, waiting the time to go into class, at exactly 8:00 AM. The bell rang.
I first had maths. I knew everything the teacher told us, and I was QUITE bored, yes.
Then, I had an hour of permanence, also known as 'nothingness'.
Then, I had two hours of Physical Education with the worst teacher in history. Especially in athletics. Oh Christ, that was baaad.
I had one hour to eat (at the canteen, ergh), then I had one hour of history-geography, and two hours of english (finally). At the second hour of english, I read a book called 'The Switch' from Anthony Horowitz. I'm on page 50, currently.
After the second hour, I prepared my bag, and went home. Finally.

April 28th, year 2009.

Nothing much happened today, different from yesterday. I woke up early, this time, though. 4:00 Am. Well, the normal time.
I had two hours of maths, one hour of history-geography (Ergh, a test on China D: ), then I had FOUR hours to eat (I don't know why they make SUCH GAPS) and then two hours of French. Heh.
To make short story long, I'm going to talk (write) to you about my friends I have here and in real life.
Almost all the friends I have in real life are all quite fun, some funny, some just like that, then I have comrades. Most of them are 'childish' (Eh, kids my age are childish normally), but they're great fun.
The friends I have online are friends I don't really know about- but that's what I like about them. I have to say, all of them are pretty mature. They must've tainted me someway <.<;;
I'm going to give out their nicknames, as to not show any personal information.

Real-Life:
Guigui- Basically, a friend I got at the beginning of the year. Very sarcastic, and loads of fun. He always sits next to me in class, saying random comments at random times. It's true that you can barely count on him for anything, but I don't count on people to do anything in the first place, sooo... Yeah.

Robinoo- An awesome person, I have to admit it. We mostly rediculise him because of his 'daydreamer' side, and he forgets a lot of things. But he's a person you can count on. He's dependant on others, sorta, but he tries to be serious in his work. I find him interesting, and that counts alot, coming from me.

Willy Henri- The short midget that sometimes gets on your nerves, sometimes makes you laugh until you're on the ground. He mostly triggers my 'perverted' side, if you want. He's the only one that can actually manage it. He's way short, but very awesome. Great friend.

Alba- The 'taller-person-than-me'. Everytime I look up at her, and I think to myself, I wanna be that tall. She's really funny, and knows when and how to smile. Of course, as most people she has a slightly 'corrupted' side, that sometimes triggers itself. I met her the first time at my first year in theatre. Go you! *high fives*

Jenn- Now, to be honest, I freaking love you. I swear. You're smiling quite often, and you are very mature in what concerns everything when you need to be that way. That's what I like about you. I wouldn't be scared to talk about my problems to you, if I had any. THAT'S how much I trust you. You're just epic and awesome. Combined.
You're the one I truly love. :3 *hugs*


Online:
Toryn- F*** YEAH! This guy's utterly awesome. He's the best friend I have on the internets. I know I can trust him, and I know he can trust me. I don't know what he looks like in real life, but that doesn't matter, right? He's a great friend, and is very mature, even soemtimes hyper, when needed. YUS! *high fives*

Whilaroo- Awesome guy. Awesome writing style. Awesome RPing skillz that killz. Need anything more? He has it. He's mature, and has a very friendly way to write, without sounding like a suck-up. Go for it! *high fives*

Dox- You're just awesome. Utterly awesome. I never thought I would meet a supposedly female person like you. You're a great friend. I've talked to you for hours and hours going, about very random things that no person of my age would be thinking about. You're great. *high fives*

There. *cramps hands*

April 29th, year 2009.

Nothing much happened differently than yesterday. It was a good day, yes, and I got a 20 in SVT, AKA Biology. So I'm pretty happy 'bout that. people call me 'lucky', but I answer, 'It's all a matter of revision and training'.
I have handball today. Yup, even if I'm on MC like a total no-life, I practice sport often, and I have great health. I'm one of the best handball players of my team, and I have a good reputation amognst other teams. I quite like the nickname I've got for me.
'Le chevelu'.
Translated in english, they call me 'The hairy one'. You'll understand if you ever see me in real life, as I have a mass of hair above my scalp. Very, very, curly hair.
I've been working on an RP character lately- Etna.
An angel that can control her blood. Hemokinetic. Kewl word, hemokinetic. I put up the BIO yesterday, and I'm still working on it. It'll get a revamp soon enough.
I just noticed I need to cut my nails, or else, they'll get ripped off in handball. <.<;;
When I try to catch the ball, and I miss, you actually thank yourself that you cut your nails before. I tried, without cutting my nails once. It was my first time, and also my last. ouch, I still remember that.
'Kay, gotta go to handball. Meet you guys soon enough.

May 1st, year 2009.

No school today. I slept until 7:00 AM. I was just too bored to get up, or to turn off my alarm radio. As I forgot to turn off the radio before I slept that night (as I always listen to a tad of music before sleeping), the alarm clock did not put on the radio, as programmed, but went off with a deafening beep that could wake the whole apartment. I thudded my fist onto the 'off' button, making it go back onto the radio. i should've pressed the 'off' button again, but I was too lazy, and, unfortunately for me, my radio is programmed for 6:00 AM and 6:15 AM.
Sooo...
BEEP BEEP BEEP.
I practically beat up my radio, and then plugged it out.
I took my breakfast near 7:30 AM. I then went on the comp.
...
*waits 15 minutes for comp to load*
*double clicks on mozilla*
*comp crashes*
*switches off red button*
*swears*
*switches it on again*
*waits 15 minutes*
*double clicks on mozilla*
*does not crash*

That's basically my day. Then, I went to a revolution against the laws of Mr. SAHRKOHZEE, our new president. Ergh...
So, I guess nuzing happened today. Well, I hope something will happen, good or bad...

Sorry, forgot to update.

May 5th, Year 2009.

No school today, because the CM2 midgets have to go into 6eme. So, no college students (If I don't miscontrue) have school today. My sister and bro do though. :3 I laugh at them.
I'm working on Bart Kraferr, in new 'armed and packed' IUNE style now.

Kinda messed up at a few frames, but Evilagram (the best critiquer on another forum) is going to help me with it.
I've been thinking alot lately. About RP characters, but also of myself, honestly. Am I really what I want to be right now? Did I do something wrong in the past, that made me what I am right now, because I always have this feeling that something is wrong? What did I do before to make people think of me as they do presently? Am I REALLY motivated to continue in my goal? Do I have the talents I want? What are my true cons? What are my true PROS? What could I do, to change everything that happened throughout my life, without it being a desperate thing?
I'm still thinking at the moment. Sometimes, I really question myself.
I hope to write again soon.

May 8th, Year 2009.

I DIDN'T write 'again soon', sorry.

Well, nothing happened too big, except from yesterday. I was invited to a birthday party (Guigui's birthday party) and we were just playing in the garden. I was running, then my foot caught in a hole. I heard a sinister crack, and a sharp pain welled up in my leg. I couldn't move. By reflex, I put myself to the gound, and started massaging it (since I have experienced in massages for every extremity of the body, and I'm an anatomy freak). But it did no good. It swelled up with time, and I got crutches. Right now, I'm writing to you, with ice on the foot, worried that it's broken (because I'll have to go to the hospital, I'm sure about that, and I don't know whether the radio is bad or good). I hope it isn't, though. I'll probably be in crutches until at least a few weeks' recovery. I guess that's my lesson to not look where I step...
But a pretty harsh one at that. ;_;
Here are the symptoms, if one of you guys can help me:
-Swelled up foot at the frontal and side parts.
-Pain ensues when doing any action with foot.
-Can't do anything with foot.
-Pain ensues even when foot is unactive.

Halp.

May 10th, Year 2009.

Hey there again. Right at this moment, I am writing with a heavy foot (Got my cast. My foot is officialy broken ;_; ) and a heavy weight on my back. What am I going to do at school tomorrow? I'll get humiliated, that's what! I mean, my broken foot goes against my moral code. That's why I'm pissed off at myself right now. You see, my moral code is pretty strict. One of the laws are, 'Whatever the pain, you shall not falter for such,'. When I see that my foot is hidden behind a humongous blod of white stuff, and that I cannot put it onto the ground, I get really pissed at myself.
I mean, I don't even look at my watch anymore. And that doesn't ever happen.
I get pissed off at my brother and sister, too, because they always blame me for having broken something (I'm the first in the family to have broken something) and I answer that they don't know what it is like to only have one foot. It's a great disadvantage. I mean, you can't run, for first, you can't walk, secondly, you can't pick up things, because you have your two hands on your crutches, and if you want to pick it up, you have to hop on your other foot, and after 5 steps, you're freaking dead!
Jesus Christ, somebody help me out here.

May 15th, Year 2009.

Still got my cast on. ;_; But I'm slightly optimistic, as I should get it off tomorrow. Normally.
What annoys me slightly at school, is at breaks, when I go to see Jenn. We meet under building C, near the entrance of the school, with some other people. Amongst these other people, there are some people that I like (Alba, that tall guy that took photos of me and Jenn, and said to me that he sold them on EbaY), that I'm neutral with (Anty), and the people I dislike (B and L).
Whenever I put my crutches down to sit on the slightly elevated wall, B always take them, and goes around. I mean, crutches aren't TOYS. Gah. That tall guy who always takes photos just stares at me weirdly. Alba is normally having a random conversation with somone else (and, in all honesty, I've been eavesdropping for a while, so whenever I'm listening to someone, my ears prick onto another conversation, and what's funny is that when B talks to me, I look as though I'm listening, but I'm concentrating on Alba's random conversation), Anty's doing the same, except they're not as random.

Meh. if I don't get my cast off, I'll force it off. Don't care what that damned hospital says.

May 18th, Year 2009.

Didn't get my cast off ;_;
I think I'm going to get depressive. Seriously. Ever since I got my cast, it seems that my whole family is against me. The way I hear it, my father's insinuating I broke my foot on purpose, just to get attention. I'm not that much of a mazochist. My mother doesn't say anything, but she probably thinks the same way as my father does. My sister is always p*ssed off at me, always yelling at me, because I always get p*ssed off at myself, since I can't do anything alone. My brother also seems to do what my sister does. I'm getting really pessimist, and I get angered easily. Jennifer saw that at school today. Hopefully, I was in a good mood back then, or else, I think I would've again done something that I would've regretted. Such as the time where I got p*ssed off at someone in boxing class, a few years ago.
And, to top of all this crap off, the trams that I now HAVE to use (since I walked to school, when I didn't have my cast) are getting worse and worse, since there is a crisis, and there's only one tram out of three, sometimes none, so I have to 'walk' to school, and back again, like I did today. I mean, you can feel the pain unduring in your arms after you had to 'walk' one kilometer with crutches. Even now, my arms are aching.
I don't know what I'm becoming.

May 20th, Year 2009.

Eh, no school tomorrow. Right now, I'm preparing for lotsa stuff, because It'll be sure to me that I'll be bored tomorrow. Eh, figures. I even chronometered the time it took for my computer to totally start up.
3 minutes, 31 seconds and 21 hundreths! My computer's that slow. I mean, others just start up in the blink of an eye. Okay, long blink of 30 seconds, but still! It's a blink of my computer's eye! *shoots computer*
I still think I'm gonna get depressive. We only take off my cast the 10th of June, and the panto rehearsals are the 3 and 4th of June. I won't be able to totally unleash myself like I planned for the whole year ;_;
And Jenn's trying to be a sound technician. Again. Well, I don't blame her, she'll pass the age of acting on scene (yes, there's an age regulation sorta thing, and people surpassing a certain age cannot act on scene, and have to do sound technician or lights). I'll try acting, as I'm still young =w=
Eh. I'm gonna fail at the dance, though. With my freaking cast, I can't move my leg correctly. ;_; Fare me well.

You know, you were in the panto last year, and therefore you'll be an exception because you can't do the dance. They'll remember your performance in this year' panto, and go more on that than what you can't do now. You should be fine. You're a good actor, (I know, I was watching you. Not much else to do at the technician table between sound cues).

Yeah, but...
Eh, I guess you got a point.
But what if they DON'T. o.o
Meep.
;_;

I've been watching the auditions for four years. You're not the only one to have auditioned with a cast =)

<.<
Well, that gives me some hope. Anyways, I didn't go to the auditions yet, so I can still practice.
Yet.
;_;